Creative Band Names

Ever thought of starting your own band just so you could have a really cool name? Maybe I do have too much time on my hands, but it's an exercise in mental masturbation to come up with creative names. I mean, I've got to do something to keep my mind sharp while I labor through my normal day. So here's some names I've come up with lately:

• Chainsaw Brain Surgeon
• Goobersmooch (I really like this one)
• Retarded Monkey

I know, they don't measure up to Black Sabbath, Def Leppard, or Metallica (though Goobersmooch smacks of Godsmack ;-) , but they're mine, dammit!!! So if some band comes out in the next few years with one of these names, I'm suing!!

Speaking of suing, I wonder if I could sue all the spammers for the lost time I spend deleting their idiotic messages. I mean, do any of them really think I want to buy a cheap Rolex, some no-name stock, or that I really need Viagra (who have they been talking to). Or better yet, the e-mails from Africa wanting me to help them get their money out of some bank. I get roughly 30 e-mails a day and only 5 or so are legit.

Nearly as bad are the friends who forward every funny e-mail they recieve, despite the fact that you've already received the same e-mail from the same person who sent it to them, with your name cleary in the "To:" line. Jebus, stop for a second and frackin' read it. And please, stop sending me e-mails that promise something good will happen if I forward the e-mail to 7 of my friends. It won't... trust me....